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Post by Fleck on Mar 17, 2013 21:32:10 GMT -8
I'm still not really expecting too much feedback at this point. At chapter 10, the story is only just beginning to really gain momentum. I know I keep saying, "X is the chapter when the story gets going!" but I'm using different definitions of "gets going." I'd say chapters 3 and 4 are important because they are when the central conflicts of the story are introduced. Chapter 10 is when things finally come to blows, and it becomes too late to back out. But there's still some up and down chapters to come, while plot points are introduced and explained, and characters are moved into positions. We've still got a few more chapters before we get to a point where I'll be like, "Okay, you HAVE to have an opinion on the story by now." But until then, silence and an occasional "atta boy" is fine.
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Post by Bob on Apr 2, 2013 20:33:24 GMT -8
Read Chapter 11. I still think Seifer is Sawyer, but I think it's mostly the use of "ain't"s and other kinda hick slang he tosses out occasionally.
Other than that...not much else to say. Atta boy!
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Post by Fleck on Apr 3, 2013 0:20:15 GMT -8
I'm okay with the Seifer/Sawyer comparison for now. It's gonna be awhile before we see all of Seifer's facets, so the comparison is apt at this point in the story. Hopefully I'm a competent enough writer to shake that comparison by the end and make Seifer totally distinct. We'll see.
Anyway, CHAPTER 12! READ IT!
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Post by Bob on Apr 6, 2013 15:50:54 GMT -8
I AM CAUGHT UP ON FUTURE BOUND! BOOYAKA!
Interesting chapter. I'm still really digging on this idea of draw points in the world, now including monsters with their magics. Really makes FF8 feel more...something. I guess it kinda makes it seem like FF8's draw system wasn't just some idea tacked on because they wanted to try something new. I'm really curious about Hyne's Fount and all the draw points and such.
Hardest thing with this story's format is to try to remember who knows what. I know SOMEBODY knows about the gardens being on big draw points, but hell if I can remember whom. Not a bad thing, just something going through my mind currently.
Another comment that might seem negative but isn't: this chapter made me not really like Rinoa. I never really loved her, so it fits, but she's probably my least favorite POV so far. Funny that I'm constantly itching for a new Quistis chapter, being that I really never cared for Quistis.
I do like the POV though. It's nice to view the world from many angles. Quistis and Zell are kinda the Garden home base, mixing in with Ciel and such, Squall and Rinoa are learning new theories in Esthar with Laguna and Big O (you still somehow make Odine comically brilliant, even when he's not making jokes), and Irvine, Selphie, and Seifer exploring the war from the Galbadian front.
Those are the thoughts in my head at the moment. Continue writing, sir!
Atta boy...TIMES TEN!
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Post by Fleck on Apr 6, 2013 21:27:06 GMT -8
Thank you, thank you! I am definitely aiming at a greater sense of completeness to the world (is that the word you're looking for?) by tying together all the disparate plot threads in the world and making them fit in with each other. I'm also trying to, retroactively, have FF8's plot make more sense.
I'm not surprised that you don't like Rinoa, but if I may ask what specifically don't you like about her? You might be picking up on character traits that I don't want her to have/don't want to emphasize, so I'd need to address that moving forward.
Anyway, thanks again for reading!
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Post by Bob on Apr 7, 2013 15:17:24 GMT -8
I think I don't like Rinoa's general not wanting to look stupid, paired with her semi-confrontational attitude. Granted, a lot of this in FB was in her head, like the thought to Piet to "Bite [her]," but like, he was kinda justified in his bitterness toward her.
It's been awhile since playing FF8, but Rinoa's personality almost strikes me more as early-Rinoa the princess of the Forest Owls more than late-Rinoa the...something different-ish.
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Post by Fleck on Apr 7, 2013 18:28:22 GMT -8
Ah. That's fine then. The thing about Rinoa is that the game never really explores her character after she becomes a sorceress. After all, she becomes a sorceress and is then in a coma for almost all of Disc 3. She and Squall have a talk about it on the Ragnarok, then she goes to Esthar, Squall saves her, and then they all go to Ultimecia. The game never really addresses Rinoa's feelings post-Sorceress-ing and that's something I'm trying to do.
From what I was able to gather from Rinoa's end-of-game conversations, Rinoa seems very intimidated by her own power. Repeatedly, she mentions being afraid of how others will treat her if they know about her powers. She's afraid that everyone in the world will hate her for being a sorceress.
I, then, expanded on those fears. I'm trying to have Rinoa work out her feelings about her powers, and I do that by comparing her to other sorceresses. She's defining herself by distancing herself from Ultimecia and Adel. "Yes, I'm a sorceress, but I am not them." She understands the power and the burden that comes with being a sorceress, but she isn't secure enough to know how to use that power for good. So when Piet makes an off-hand comment, blaming her for the destruction of the Lunar Base (even though, in the same paragraph, he admits that he knows it wasn't really her), Rinoa gets offended. They both know that Ultimecia is responsible for the destruction of the Lunar Base, yet Piet seems flippant about the distinction. And since Rinoa is in the midst of an identity crisis, she responds with anger and distrust when someone suggests that she is in any way similar to Ultimecia.
I hope that helps you like her or understand her more.
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Post by Bob on Apr 7, 2013 19:51:26 GMT -8
I always kinda understood (though the end-game stuff helps, too), I just am not a huge fan of her personality. Not saying it's a bad character, just not a character I like too much.
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Post by Fleck on Apr 7, 2013 20:01:00 GMT -8
Alright. I just wanted to make sure that it wasn't because of a misunderstanding/poor writing on my part.
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